The Black Knight-Errant
by Octoya
Summary: With the barrier broken and monsters making a place for themselves above-ground, there isn't a lot of conflict in the Kingdom of Monsters anymore. The Undyne of the Underfell world just might have to find it elsewhere. ...Like by teaching her alternate self a lesson, maybe. Meanwhile, the Alphyses of both worlds are seeking awkward love. Features Underfell AU and Alphyne ship.
1. Prologue

"I'm gonna FIGHT her. That other Undyne."

Papyrus' head snapped up from where he had been concentrating on stacking logs, working hard on the house while his superior leaned on the work that he had already done. "WHAT?"

She sneered in the drizzling rain and said, "You heard me."

Perhaps it would have been more productive for her to actually be helping with the construction of the city instead of brooding and staring off into the rain, but Lord knew he wasn't going to be the one to tell her that. Hell, she probably already rebuild her house in the amount of time it took most monsters to so much as move their stuff above ground. Papyrus just shouldered another huge log and fitted it into place, struggling to visualize the house that he and Sans lived in back in the underground. It was starting to take shape; it wouldn't be too much longer before he had to start thinking about the roof.

This would be a whole lot easier if his brother was actually here to help. But that ungrateful little sack of shit was probably off throwing tin cans into the mountain and lugging rocks at tiny birds, or...

Undyne rewarded Papyrus' silence with a swift kick to his shin, which luckily was still encased in armor. "Yo, maggot, you _did_ hear me right?"

"WHAT? ERM..." he scratched his skull and put down his burden. "WHY DO YOU WANT TO FIGHT THE OTHER UNDYNE?"

Satisfied, Undyne huffed and stuck her hands in the pockets of her leather jacket. The rain made her slick fishy skin glisten whenever she moved her head. "Two reasons, both about one thing: She's me. One... Meeting another version of myself is on its own a great opportunity, isn't it? I've never been defeated before."

"WHAT ABOUT THE TIME WHEN YOU FOUGHT FRI-"

" _I've never been defeated before_." She squinted, and though Papyrus itched to go back to building the house, he didn't like the idea of that squint turning into something nasty. Frowning, she continued, "Somebody using cowardly tactics doesn't count. But I want to feel like someday I could be - I want to get into a battle with somebody as great as _I_ am. Or, considering the kind of world that she comes from, at least half as great."

Papyrus screwed up his bony face. "AND THEN GET DEFEATED BY HER?"

"No!" A clang resounded through the rain as she kicked his armored shin again. "I want to win, I want to pulverize her. But... I want it to mean something when I do. And that just isn't something I can get here."

"OH." With a frown on his face Papyrus to look over at King Asgore, ruler of the monsters at LV 20, who has never been defeated in battle. With an emotionless expression he directing a group of underlings in rebuilding his castle, dark armor glinting in the dim light. "I SEE?"

Turned half-away from him, Undyne wasn't looking in his direction but instead had started to look out towards the human city in the distance. As the rain slowly let up, the lights were becoming clearer. As the day slowly turned to night, the lights were becoming brighter. "Two. It bothered me when we were there, seeing somebody go around with my face, being a nice sappy little shit to all the monsters, and _especially_ to the humans. Made me sick, actually." Stretching her arms out wide, she cracked her knuckles. "If she's gonna continue sullying... me... like that, I'll just have to go make sure we don't have the same face anymore."

"UM-" Papyrus twitched, and Undyne glared his way. His armor was the only thing that gave him the strength to continue, "I GET THAT YOU LIKE FIGHTING? BUT I DON'T THINK THAT WE SHOULD BE ATTACKING THE OTHER MONSTERS IN THE BLUE WORLD FOR NO REASON? ...? I THINK THAT FRISK WOULD GET UPSET AND ASGORE MIGHT GET UPSET AND THAT OTHER SANS WOULD GET UPSET AND..."

"Jesus Christ," Undyne said, folding her arms. "Since when am I the only one of us that likes to fight? Number one that 'Blue Sans,' as they call him, doesn't scare me and he's not even gonna be involved. Number two Frisk and Asgore don't have to find out if you don't tell them."

"BUT IT COULD GET OUT."

She shrugged. "Alright well, I won't just _attack_ her. I'll just challenge her to a duel. If she's anything like me, she'll accept, and nobody can complain that we end up fighting. There's nothing wrong with me doing that, is there?"

Papyrus leaned a hand against the frame of his unfinished house, as the rain became a quiet drizzle. He grimaced, as his not-stomach flipped in a knot. Undyne had one of those smiles on her face, a kind that he'd seen before in some unpleasant circumstances. "OKAY, WELL." He sputtered, groping for the words, and ended with, "WE CAN'T REALLY GET BACK THERE ANYWAY SINCE SANS HASN'T GOTTEN HIS MACHINE UP HERE YET."

This, at least, gave her pause, and she shrugged as Papyrus measured up the doorway with his thumbs and forefingers. "I guess you have a point about that."

"YEAH EXACTLY, WHO KNOWS HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE TO FIX UP HERE ANYWAY?" He jerked, suddenly; it was as if someone was planting him ideas, they came to him so fast. "ESPECIALLY SINCE EVERYONE IS. YOU KNOW. BUSY TRYING TO BUILD THE NEW CITY."

"Yeah, yeah." Undyne leaned back and look out over the moody expanse of clouds. Papyrus himself didn't like to see how much open space there was between himself and the ceiling of this world. "I guess I have to put this on hold no matter what I do."

And he honestly hoped that was the end of it, as he fitted a door in the frame and willed it to fix in place. But Undyne pushed off, folding her arms, and she said, "Keep on eye on things, though. As soon as Neo New Home is finished - as soon as Sans' machine is ready - I'm going to that other world and I'm kicking the shit out of that other Undyne."

Papyrus didn't say anything, and having made her declaration Undyne just walked past with that wide pointed smile. He brushed the lingering traces of Snowdin snow off the roof and contemplated getting it all the way on top of the house.

Maybe he should find Sans for this.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Note for people not on AO3: This story takes place in the Bunny Fell-Fell series, of which "The Many Worlds Theory Sucks" and "This Game is Too Hard" are earlier installments. I don't think it's necessary, though, to read the other two stories to understand this one. The main thing to understand is that it features Underfell and Undertale universes that are aware of each other and both of them are post-pacifist.

SO. Here we go on the next fanfiction for this series. It's a brand new story so I've got more interest in it and hopefully that translates into more frequent updates! I'm using a dictation software to write some of this though, so expect some weird typos.

Now... I haven't written a lot of Fell Dyne or normal Undyne, but I'm hoping I'll get a much better handle on her with this fic ;w;

 **Next Chapter:** Unfamiliar Waters


	2. Unfamiliar Waters

On dark cloudy days, Alphys liked to curl up somewhere warm, put on a show that she had already seen ten times before, and wait until it was time to fall asleep. Undyne liked to play chicken with the weather, showing the dummies in the practice yard a bad time until the rain started. Of course even then, there were plenty of things to do in New New Home.

She found her feet tapping, her leg jumping, her fingers wiggling together, all while Toriel, Asgore, and Alphys talked. She didn't really have business there-although she was one of the community leaders, issues of public health weren't really her area - not unless they were talking about EXERCISE and TURNING SHRIMPS INTO WARRIORS.

But this conversation was about medicine and illness, which aside from being completely out of her realm of experience (Undyne had never gotten sick a day in her life, especially not before coming to the surface) was pretty boring. Alphys at least looked like she was having a good time with it. Over the last few weeks, she'd been pretty worried. More so than usual, anyway, staying up late trying to figure out why so many monster children and adults were calling in sick.

 _"Oh it's just the flu" said the humans_ , Undyne recalled as she shifted on the big tub of anime figurines that Alphys hadn't found space for yet. _"It's cold and flu season for us, you must have been exposed. It'll pass before you know it."_

Well, it did start to pass eventually, but that didn't mean they weren't still at risk for being exposed to a lot of _other_ illnesses. So every night it was like that. Alphys at her computer, clacking away, trying to figure out why this was happening and doubling down on meals wondering if something a lot worse was going to come along.

She sure looked better today, gesturing to the slideshow she stayed up late to make in Powerpoint. "S-so, so, what this means is, that although we-we're _not_ susceptible to human viruses, monster bodies, b-being made of magic, are affected by - I mean, they affect - I mean, they're affected by - I mean, they affect _and_ are affected by..."

Undyne flashed her a thumbs up. Her cheeks red, Alphys nodded and flipped to the next slide, continuing in a stronger voice. "-the magical environment around them. Uhh, in Mt. Ebott, since we had been there for so long, our bodies adapted to an increasingly m-magic rich climate, which was i-improved especially with the creation of the Core. B-but here, on the surface, we've been completely... well, we're out of our element. So.. um... that's... _bad_ , and all."

Asgore sneezed into his handkerchief, punctuating Alphys' pause, his own little bout of illness still running its course. Queen Toriel frowned, putting her hand to her mouth. "Oh dear, do you mean to say that we are unsuited to surface life?"

"NO!" Undyne pounded her fist against her leg without even thinking, causing them all to jump. "No WAY are we going back underground!"

With a look towards her, Alphys smiled weakly and then pointed back to the slide. It showed two pictures of Mt. Ebott, one a luscious green and one snowcapped. "Th-there's no need to worry, you're majesty, I d-don't think that this whole thing is p-permanent. You see, from s-studying the progress..."

Five empty ramen cups sat on the top of Alphys' computer, stained in pale broth. Just like they sat there at the start of the meeting, just like they had sat there five minutes into the meeting, just like they had sat there ten minutes into the meeting, and just like they were still sitting there now. Undyne frowned, picking at her teeth with one webbed finger. Five seconds later, yep, still there. They could probably be somewhere other than the computer if there was a clean surface available in Alphys' lab. But there were empty cups, cola bottles, and well-read history books scattered as far as she could see from where she sat. A couple empty containers of General Tso chicken lined a set of shelves on the wall.

If Alphys picked up, she could probably unload the figurines from this tub and put them there. Then the tub could go to a better use.

Like what, becoming another trash can?

"...don't overdo it, plenty of f-fresh air and exercise to help with recovery-"

Undyne's fishy ear twitched. "HELL YEAH," she said, snapping her head back in the group's direction. "Just leave that to me!" She gave Alphys a big grin, and the Dreemurrs as well. They smiled in turn, not missing a beat.

"I'll make sure to schedule it; I'll have a message sent to Snowdout so they know to do that as well," said Asgore, with another hard sneeze and sniffle into his handkerchief. "Though, I imagine they are doing much better."

Toriel nodded, murmuring, "As for me, we already have a gym period in school. I hope that that will help."

"A-absolutely!" Said Alphys. "Just remember..."

Undyne's leg jumped and she pulled herself into another of several sitting positions tested on this tub. Alphys needed to get a few more chairs in this place, or at least needed to clear her ramen and chicken containers off the couch so more people could sit on it.

Or maybe some exercise equipment. That way Undyne wouldn't have to lug her own all the way from her house whenever she stayed the night, not that she ever minded doing that! It got her blood pumping for sure.

Come to think of it, some of the trash and crap gathering all over the floor was probably why Alphys ended up sleeping on that little pull-out bed instead of a proper one. Granted, not all of it was trash-lots of the things she heaped in piles were robotics parts and machines that she had to move up from True Lab in the underground. Which she hadn't put away yet.

"And d-don't overdo it, okay, Your Majesty?" Toriel and Asgore were standing up, as the meeting seemed to be over at last. Alphys shut off the projector, breathing a sigh of relief that only Undyne was able to catch. "A-and just let me know if there are any other problems, this isn't really my f- I mean, I- this hasn't ever happened to me before... really."

"We will be sure to keep you informed," said Toriel as she descended the escalator first. Tired and faint, she barely gave them a backward glance; Undyne shrugged her off.

After Toriel, it wasn't long before Asgore was gone as well. That left just Alphys and Undyne; she hopped off the tub, cracking her knuckles and stretching. "Hooooh, boy, what a speech. I bet you're glad THAT'S over with!"

"Yeah, huh, thanks for the help l-last night," Alphys said, and then she giggled, "You pretended to be Asgore _really well_."

"No sweat, me and Papy had fun," Undyne flashed a big smile and walked around the couch. She had to be careful not to brush her boots on a stack of papers right in her path, bounding over them. Old data compilations, the top looked like. She couldn't say anything about that, even in her head-she didn't own a filing cabinet back home either. Her broom closet? A MESS with old guard reports she didn't even NEED anymore.

"S-so... did you want to do something now?"

Hell, she had a bag on her. "Yeah!" Undyne took it out of her inventory, making a lazy beeline for the trash on the couch. "I brought over a couple of movies, the guy at the human rental place said that they're _badass_. Just give me a sec, I'll clear out a little space!"

"Oh-! Wait!" The moment Undyne had a cup ramen container in her hands, Alphys had grabbed her wrist, keeping it in place simply by virtue of Undyne's own surprise. "Y-y-you don't have to do that!" She sucked in a breath. "I was gonna take care of it anyway."

Releasing the ramen cup, Undyne laughed. Instead, she brought out two DVDs from her pocket as she spoke, unimpeded by the hand on her wrist. "Alphys, it's been weeks. C'mon, we should be able to _spread out_ on this couch when we're watching these bad boys."

Alphys released Undyne, and watched with an increasingly red face as she put the containers all away in a bag. "Right... okay."

When the couch was clear, Undyne put a hand on her hip and eyed the shelves and other piles on the ground. "Hey, as long as I've got this bag out, you want me to take care of some other stuff?"

"Uh!?" She'd begun to sweat, the other monster, chewing on her thumb. "No, that's fine, t-that's not-I mean, I've pretty much got a system laid out for how I was g-going to clean the place."

After a pause, Undyne gestured to the laboratory surrounding them. "So... what system would that be? When's it getting put into action? I'm just saying, your lab is going to be pretty hard to move around in after a while. And you can't even unpack because of some of this stuff."

"I know, I'm taking care of it," said Alphys.

"If you _want,_ I could take care of it now, though," Undyne said, as she put the bag back into her inventory.

Alphys paused, wringing her hands. Her cheeks puffed up, a little red, and Undyne raised an eyebrow as she muttered, "Well, it's. Well. It's not as though your house is always so clean, I-I-I distinctly remember we had to bring it up from the underground all b-b-burnt. And! Plus! the next day I found sauce and salt _all_ over the floor."

"I fixed those things up though?" Undyne shook her head, her red ponytail swishing in a stream behind her. "Besides, I thought you _wanted_ me to help you get into better shape. You're not gonna get there surrounded by trash all the time."

"You sure seemed okay with being surrounded by trash during our first date," Alphys said, shooting a look off to the side and chewing on her cheek.

"Uh, okay? That was completely different?"

As Undyne's voice rose, Alphys' did too. "I know! L-l-look, let's just stop talking about it, okay? I want to watch the movie or-or-or whatever we're doing, not talk about m-me doing spring cleaning or whatever this... turned into."

Just as Alphys sucked on her cheeks, Undyne did as well. But it passed, and she once again gave Alphys a big toothy smile. "Uh, right, so the MOVIES."

"R-right," Alphys sat down on the couch, with Undyne plopping down to follow suit once the first DVD had been inserted in the player. "What kind did you get?"

"This one we're watching right now has Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the cover, so I figure it's gotta be totally awesome!" Undyne said, pumping a fist, and Alphys smiled. She hesitated, though, while her lizardlike friend was flipping through channels. "Frisk was the one to tell me about the movie. Where the heck _are_ they today anyway?"

"Oh, did you- uh. Did you want to invite Frisk too?"

Undyne pulled a full bag of chisps out from under the couch, where Alphys usually tended to keep them these days. Ease of access. Empty cookie packages were taking up space in her cupboards anyway. "Dunno, but I bet they'd like to watch it again."

"W-well, Frisk is actually with Sans today," Alphys murmured, switching on subtitles.

Although they were both sitting down, they could stand to be a little bit closer to each other... Undyne nudged herself over, just a tiny bit. "Yeah? What are they doing?"

"Sans got a little bit better recently." Alphys was adjusting her glasses-wiping them on her lab coat, eyes turned down from the animation on the screen. "And he finished fixing up his machine. So they're going to go v-visit that... other world."

"Oh, shit." Undyne pulled a face. Not that she had gotten to see much of the other world for herself, that parallel dimension or whatever from which strange versions of themselves had appeared. She mostly had hearsay to go on, in particular Papyrus' descriptions of that "poor pointy Sans" that had been such a delinquent over in New New Home for a while. Once or twice, she saw a monster that might have been the parallel version of her - but something felt way, way off. So she never got too close.

"...Yeah."

The only sound was the blaring of the TV, for a bit. Undyne eased herself a little bit closer to Alphys on the couch. Alphys had again looked down to fish for her own bag of chisps. As Undyne finally put her bag between them, she said, a little quieter. "Yeah, uh... I wonder how that's going."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** God sorry that this was later than I thought it would be. Once again it's not lack of interest so much as difficulty finding the time. I've got plenty of ideas and I want to share them orz.

But ayyy I finally explained the whole illness thing from the first fanfic. Which you don't need to read to understand because it's pretty much spelled out here 0 0;

Just as I have to get used to Felldyne's perspective, I'm trying to get into writing Undyne Classic. It might behoove me to go look into some of her scenes from the game again.

 **Next Chapter:** Today's the Day


	3. Today's the Day

The rain that clustered thickly around Mt. Ebott subsided for the afternoon, leaving only the dark clouds behind. A calm day, a quiet day. Humans in the city were hoping for a few rays of sunlight today or even more tomorrow. In Neo New Home, monsters swept up the branches and leaves that the blustery winds had thrown into their streets last night. Papyrus, too, wasn't spared; his house, built in the shadow of three big trees, got a branch through the window.

That wasn't even his biggest problem today.

Because on that day she sauntered inside, a big and sharp smile upon her face, dressed in a grey combat jacket, cargo pants and black heeled boots. Not her armor, but not her normal casual clothes. As she crossed over the threshold into his house, he stepped back, his bony eyebrows rising and then quickly falling.

His sharp teeth gritting together. "TO WHAT DO I OWE THIS VISIT, GUARD CAPTAIN?"

She gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "It's not as guard captain."

Papyrus' head twitched, just an inch, in the direction of Sans' bedroom. He huffed, crossing his arms. "TO WHAT DO I OWE THIS VISIT, _UNDYNE?_ " Although by this point, he already knew. Her big yellow eyes zeroed-in on his face, and her mouth quirked. She knew that he knew, too.

"It's time," she said.

* * *

"huh. guess we should have moved to snowdout after all."

Papyrus had clutched at the back of his head with his bare bony fingers, growling as he paced the length of the floor. "SOMEHOW I DON'T THINK THAT WOULD HAVE HELPED."

Sans chuckled, hands dug deep into his pockets as always. "i like to think that people get deterred by long distances."

"NO SANS, THAT'S JUST YOU," Papyrus snarled back, rubbing his forehead with the heel of his hand. The headache was already developing while monsters bustled back and forth on main street outside. Take some deep breaths, relax. It's no good getting worked up over nothing. Even if he was certain it wasn't "nothing" at all. "NOW THINK OF SOMETHING ACTUALLY HELPFUL TO SAY."

His brother shrugged. "well i could just power the machine off and tell undyne that it ain't workin' right now. 'course, that would only buy us time until either one of the frisks gets it in their head to visit their buddy again."

"MMN... YES! DO THAT! I CAN LIVE WITH MORE TIME!"

Sans shrugged again, pulling out his cellphone, and he started tapping and texting with it as he spoke. "when is our lovely guard captain gonna come over asking about this anyway?"

"I DON'T KNOW!?" Papyrus stopped in front of the kitchen, bitterly turning over in his head the possibility of heating something disgusting up (like one of Alphys' TV-dinners that Sans has been going so crazy for) just to take his mind off things. "I JUST KNOW THAT IT'S GOING TO BE SOON!"

From the minute he heard that the final touches had been added to Asgore's palace, he knew that it wouldn't be long. Almost everyone else had been happy with their accomplishments over the past few weeks. Neo New Home was glorious in its completion, with traditional grey, Romanesque buildings that were almost identical to the New Home below ground-albeit, the buildings had to be built at about half the height, or risk some eagle-eyed human spotting them above the trees. Asgore's castle had taken the most work. But Papyrus couldn't be proud of himself, his subordinates, or any of the monsters he liked to consider his subordinates. He had too much fretting to do.

"what's the big deal, anyway? so she goes and throws a few punches over there; they're pretty forgiving people," Sans was saying, snacking on an off-white mayonnaise packet. "mind you, i know that from experience." Although his cheesy little wink broke off in a small wheeze at the furious glare that Papyrus had whipped at him. They didn't need to talk about all the trouble that _he_ caused in that other timeline back before Frisk broke their barrier.

But by the next second, Papyrus had already moved on and Sans could relax. "IF SHE WAS JUST GOING TO DO _THAT_ , IT WOULD NOT BE MY PROBLEM! BUT YOU WITH YOUR TINY LITTLE MIND, YOU DON'T GRASP THE-"

Right then, that was when it happened. They both heard a knock on the door.

And that was when he'd opened it up to find her there, illuminated by the grey light of the overcast surface sky.

And so when she made that announcement, he'd faltered and pressed his clawlike hands together. "TIME FOR... WHAT," he said, a bead of sweat on his skull.

"Don't play dumb Papyrus," she said, thumping his chest with a webbed hand. Then right into the living room she went, hands on her hips. "Where's your brother? I need to talk to him."

"SANS? HE'S RIGHT-" Papyrus turned his head; Sans was gone from the couch, mayonnaise packet and all. He uttered a low growl and folded his arms. "...I'LL GO GET HIM."

Sure enough, when he entered Sans' room he found him there, texting away. Papyrus scowled, and he looked up with his usual smile. "yo, boss." His claws clicked across a few more buttons, and then abruptly Sans closed the phone and shoved it in his pocket. "and sent."

Papyrus tapped the heel of his boot against the floorboards, arms folded across his chest. Boy would he have been happy to be able to give Sans a beating right now. "WHAT WERE YOU JUST DOING?"

"savin' your ungrateful ass," Sans said, although keeping his eyes on his brother's face the whole time - knowing he was an inch away from stepping over the line. Papyrus only raised an eyebrow, and he continued, "you'll get it later. or you won't, maybe. anyway i'm guessin' that Undyne's down there waiting to make good on her little self-imposed challenge, right?"

Papyrus half-turned in the direction of the living room. "NNYEH, THAT IS CORRECT."

"guess we gotta go have a talk then." Sans put his hands in his pockets with a nod. "got it."

Undyne had gone well into impatient while waiting for them, greeting the sight of both brothers with her hands on her hips as she stood in the middle of the floor. "'Sup Sans, it's been a while," she said, her lips twisting into a pointy-toothed sneer.

What Sans was feeling that particular moment, Papyrus couldn't guess; obviously, to a large extent that was because he smiled no matter what he was feeling, but even his eyes had gone flat as he mirrored Undyne's expression. "'sup."

Papyrus kept moving his head, trying to keep his gaze on them both as Sans approached. He didn't need a fight breaking out in his house.

"I was hoping to ask you for a little favor," said Undyne, tilting her head. "The other day, someone saw that you finished installing that machine of yours in your workshop. You brought out the Frisk from the other world with it."

Sans twitched. "you saw that, huh?"

"Saw it, or heard it down the grapevine." She smiled bigger, if that was possible. "So uh, since it is working again I was wondering if you'd let me take it out for a spin, go visit that nicer other place."

Much faster than anyone would credit his little form capable of, Sans was already down on the bottom step of the staircase and he rocked on his heels with a sharply intaken laugh. "c'mon, i know it's about you wantin' a piece out of your blue double."

Undyne's head whipped towards Papyrus, "You _told_ him?"

Papyrus' spine went stuff; what, was that not allowed? "OF COURSE NOT?!"

"just heard it," Sans said, taking her attention back on him, "down the grapevine." He sniggered, as always too proud of himself, and Undyne rolled her eyes. In the next moment, he had calmed a little, and he only added, "hey, i'm just saying. you wanna go take yourself on. i can respect that."

She folded her hands behind her back. "If that's the case, then show me your machine."

"uh," here, Sans closed one eyesocket, scratching at the area around his nose-cavity. "i'm not so sure i can help you today, though. i'm kind of expectin' company."

Now her smile became a frown. Not a very friendly one. "Aside from Frisk, what dope would you visit you?"

Papyrus jumped when, in the midst of the growing tension, a knock sounded against the door. While he scrambled to answer it, Sans shrugged and remained on the bottom step. "a specific dope."

From behind the door, eyes flitting nervously back and forth behind swirled spectacles, Papyrus found himself face to face with Dr. Alphys. He recoiled, just a little, with a look of disgust. Only after she'd begun to stammer - and who even knew what she was saying, Papyrus didn't bother to listen - did he have a glimpse of understanding, and Papyrus stepped back to allow her entry. Still flabbergasted, he could only helplessly speak over her stammers, "COME IN, ALPHYS."

"-Oh," Alphys said, her first attempt at coherency. It turned into a squeak; now her eyes had lit on Undyne.

And Undyne, likewise, whirled around.

The sudden silence fell thick and fast like a net over everyone in the house. Papyrus tried to break it by slamming the door shut after the good(?) doctor but, after Alphys uttered another squeak and jumped, it just seemed to settle again. As she stared Undyne's expression had turned blank, unfathomable, while Sans was grinning from one end of his face to the other.

Suddenly, Undyne put a hand behind her head and looked away, voice flat. "Hello Alphys."

Much like the slamming door, it didn't tear the net completely away. Alphys wrung her hands and pulled on the ends of her lab coat, readjusting the ill-fitting garment over her back and dress. "H-h-h-hell... lll..."

Watching the two, Sans' smile had started to spread, and Papyrus knew it would be only a matter of time before he started snorting at all the discomfort in the room. He stared, his eyesockets burning holes in his brother until it got his attention, and then he drew a bony finger across his own neck. Message received; Sans' smile dropped to its normal size and he coughed.

"asked alph' over to help me with some of my old projects," he said, and the two ladies stared at him. "started thinkin' lately that i should give them another shot, y'know?"

"Oh," Alphys said.

And Undyne turned from Alphys to Sans, and then from Sans to Alphys, her expression twisting after he'd spoken. She opened her mouth, but when her gaze had flickered back to Alphys no words could come out. Papyrus blinked; every time he'd seen Alphys and Undyne together like this, Undyne would become this strange conflicted person he couldn't make sense of. Especially today, it was as if her entire course was thrown off; had Sans known that this would happen?

Lately Sans seemed to know way too much stuff that he didn't know.

"Yeah bye." Alphys had just opened her mouth again when Undyne said this, her voice still completely dry of affect. She turned right around and walked to the door, taking a deep breath and not even glancing Alphys' way as she walked past. Without turning around, she said, "I'll come back when you're not busy, _Sans and Papyrus_."

Papyrus jerked up with his hands behind his back, nodding respectfully her way. "LOOKING FORWARD TO IT, GUARD CAPTAIN!"

Undyne opened the door, slammed it shut behind her, and then from the sound of it leaped out over the steps and onto the street. Papyrus twitched as he relaxed. "WHAT THE _HELL?_ " He said, as under his breath as his kind of speech could be, and returned his eyes to Sans and Alphys for an explanation. Alphys had turned back towards the door and only stared, while Sans stood still and _winked_ at his brother.

He coughed again. "sorry, all of that projects stuff was just bullshit, but, uh... you sure came over quick," he said with a snort, and only by doing so did he take Alphys' eyes away from where Undyne's back had disappeared.

She lowered her head, shoving up her glasses as they slid down her snout. "Well... I-I wanted to-to-to-to talk to you about something too, also, anyway. I di-didn't realize I was int-t-t-terrupting something immportant."

"ehh, not that important, just the boss getting 'rattled' over something," said Sans, and as Papyrus fumed behind Alphys he added quickly, "let's go to the shed. i'll tell you about it. fill you in. give you the scoop."

"SANS-"

"throw you a bone."

Even as Alphys and Sans disappeared in that weird, startling way, some of the tension practically dripped out of Papyrus' bones. He didn't know what just happened, but he understood one thing at least.

With Alphys here, his superior would not have a chance to go into the blue timeline. With Alphys here, there would be no fighting an innocent - or at least undeserving - blue monster. With Alphys here, there wouldn't be any stirring up trouble.

Clearly she was some kind of Undyne repellent.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Still slowly chugging along, making plans and trying to keep them.

 **Next Chapter:** A Moment of Ugh


	4. A Moment of Ugh

It was another overcast day, and everyone in Neo New Home was acting sluggish, but that didn't mean that it wasn't time for some TRAINING.

That was, at least, Undyne's assessment. When things were moody and slow, that was a good time to get her blood pumping. Out in the open air, just her and a few hired dummies (or some non-possessed dummies, but where was the fun in that?) and nothing but the rush of adrenaline as she honed her abilities. Swift Punch Technique, or Spear Bullet Technique, whatever was going to cause the most flash and substance. Sometimes she could work up a real sweat chasing those dummies around the yard.

Today, it wasn't just her and the dummies. Alphys stood outside with her too, dressed in a track suit and facing off against a dummy of her own.

Although, facing off wasn't really the word that a bystander looking in would use to describe what she was doing. Alphys had magic like the rest of them, but forming it into a bullet pattern of attack had been beyond her means for years - the best that she could do used to be making vague little magical shapes, if she tried, or just putting all of her magic energy into her magics. So Alphys "facing off" had consisted of using her hands and feat in a vaguely attack-like pattern. Slapping and kicking and punching, when the punches didn't miss, building up muscle rather than aim.

Undyne didn't mind; there were plenty of people in the former Royal Guard who'd needed a little extra help getting their magic to that strong, definitive point.

Recently, even that had shown promise; Alphys could create her own offensive bullets now. Little weak beams that zigzagged through the air and popped against the target, moving like the snake arcade game. Undyne had been so proud of the day that they showed up; it's only going to get better from here! she had said with a yell.

Today, she would occasionally look over at Alphys and her progress while she went up against her target. A dummy, but hers was possessed by a ghost; after all, when she summoned and threw spears, she wanted something that was able to DUCK.

Alphys' dummy... did not need to duck.

It wasn't that she didn't land hits, no. It was just the weight behind each one. When Undyne landed a hit, either a punch or a magic bullet, she put her heart and soul into it, all of her confidence and expectation that this hit would shatter her opponent instantly - even if that wasn't always going to be the case. Alphys landed hits more like... she was more afraid that her opponent would get mad at her for trying to land a hit at all.

So, the dummy looked about as new as it was when Undyne first dragged it onto their training field.

After glancing over at Alphys' attack style for yet another time, Undyne straightened up and let loose a hail of spears towards her hapless dummy; the ghost, who by now was familiar with Undyne's "finishing move", flew right out of the vessel before her magical attacks obliterated it. And then, well, all that was left was a smoldering circle where the bullets hit.

Clapping her hands together, as if to rid herself of the powdered debris, Undyne glanced over Alphys' way. Alphys' jaw had dropped, as she stood staring at the sight, and Undyne couldn't help but grin a little.

"Th-th-that was _amazing_ , Undyne!"

Undyne looked over her nails (wait, she forgot that she didn't have nails) trying to play it humble, but she was still grinning when she responded to Alphys, "That's what hard work and a little pride can get you! You're _totally_ gonna be able to do attacks ten times as cool when you're done training, Alphys!"

"R-really?" She looked over the attack site in awe, the kind of personal, contextual awe from Alphys that Undyne was getting steadily better at picking out. To indulge it, she flexed a little beside the smoldering circle.

And then the awe disappeared; with it went Undyne's smile. Because Alphys' eyes cast down, and her body shriveled inward, and she was making again all of the signs that she tended to make when she was about to say something like...

"I don't really know ab-"

"Come ON!"

It startled both of them, Undyne's interruption. But it didn't matter, right? Because she'd already known what Alphys had been about to say anyway, so why waste time? That was how it felt, anyway. Jeeze. And now for a couple seconds the two of them were wasting time, staring at the big full space that had just been occupied by her words.

Undyne cleared her throat, and tried again. "You have to stop doing that, Alphie! You're gonna do great! You're gonna become strong and you're gonna get way, way, WAY better! I just know it! All you have to do is practice!"

"I-I-I know that," she mumbled, with the tiniest frown on her face. "It's just, I've been practicing for a while and I haven't _really_ been getting that much better. Ihaven'tbeengettingbetteratanyoftheotherphysicalactivitiesI'vebeendoingwithPapyruseither," she said, almost under her breath.

Taken aback, Undyne bent down towards Alphys' level with a hand on one hip, her red hair flipping around on her head. "What are you TALKING about? You've made GREAT progress! You didn't used to be able to even use magic to attack at all, and now you're doing it!"

"Yeah... but it's still not doing very much, and also there's still the whole 'training' thing that we're... um..."

You can speak with patience and understanding - enthusiastic patience and understanding - every day, every week, every hour. You can hold out hope, insist upon it, against any little voice in your head that told you to leave it be. You can hold it against the little voice in _other_ people's heads, telling the both of you to leave it be, every day. Like, a knight standing vigilant for their master or for the princess (what did knights actually do again?) You can do that.

Undyne pinched her face, screwing her good eye shut. "- _This is_ \- why I asked Papyrus to do this stuff with you."

It didn't come out the way she wanted it to; that was evident by the moment Undyne opened her eye again. Alphys' face changed color. She quickly shook her head, taking in a breath. "I-"

That was as far as she got.

The sky suddenly cracked with lightning and opened up to a torrential downpour, and the two women were soaked instantly. Alphys screamed, while Undyne just frowned and looked up at the clouds - which had a moment ago been a totally peaceful grey color, but now were dark and angry. What the hell? She sure as hell didn't hear any news about a sudden storm from the human weather-girl this morning.

Alphys raced to get under shelter, which happened to be just inside Undyne's new house; Undyne, who tended to take long long showers anyway, just stood still and squinted at the sky. A sharp tooth jutted threateningly from her mouth, as if she was daring the weather to keep up its bullshit.

And just like that, only a few seconds in, the rain went away. In fact, all of the clouds did.

Undyne stomped her wet boots while Alphys ran back to her, eyes wide underneath her glasses. "Did-did-did-did-did you just _see_ that? Did you do that? I-I-I-I mean, did you just make it _stop raining?_ "

...Their conversation wasn't over, just interrupted; Undyne looked back down at her, a squint still on her face, but all the same she couldn't resist giving a huge grin. "Aw man TOTALLY. I knew that whoever was in charge up there would crumble if I just gave them an evil enough eye! Guess the god of weather is a big pansy, huh? I'm gonna have to let Papyrus know, Fuhuhuhu!"

And then as Alphys' eyes shined, Undyne gave a dismissive. "Nah I'm pretty sure it was just a weird fluke. Cloudy one minute and then The weather's done that before, right?"

"W...well, not really," she got in response, Alphys wiping some of the rainwater off her glasses. "W-weather clears up fast sometimes, but n-n-not... changing on a dime. I m-mean it isn't s-supposed to do that. Yeah."

Undyne hooked her thumbs in her jeans pockets. "Uh, it did though."

"W-w-w-well I'm not a m-meteorologist."

"Yeah..." Although she didn't want to accidentally intimidate the sky into raining again, or something, Undyne raised her suspicious squint back to the blue sky that suddenly faced them. It was beautiful, for sure, but it wasn't the weather that human girl had said they would get. She scratched her head. "Either way, weird."

"Y-yeah, weird," Alphys repeated.

They lapsed into silence at that. Their training interrupted (and Undyne was done with her dummy anyway) and their conversation too, they stood in the sudden sunshine. They were soaked, but the warm rays would clear that up soon enough.

 _It was a good day to go for a jog up a mountain_ , is what Undyne thought suddenly. Or find out what kind of things needed doing around the city, that was a good idea too. She glanced over at Alphys, who was chewing on her lip and typing on her phone. "Hey Alph?"

"Huh?" She looked back up, blinking rapidly.

"You wanna go do something else?"

And Alphys smiled a wobbly little smile, the kind that was so cute, as she pushed her glasses back up. "Oh, ssure! We could watch some of the DVDs I bought with Sans while we were shopping in the human city?! I um, so far I've watched the Reappearance of Haruyo Mizayu and the Mysterious Adam Keikaku, but, um, there's a lot of others we can watch, t-too. If you want?"

Undyne flashed her a big smile. "Hell yeah! Let's watch some more anime. I'll call Paps over to join us... and he can help clean up my mess too," Undyne mused, scuffing her toe on the smoldering circle.

"Oh - er - you want Papyrus to join us this time?"

A quick nod, a text already sent. "Yeah, he'll be here in a flash."

At that, Alphys tugged at her so-called training clothes and nodded, flushing as she backed away towards the house. "L-let me change, then..."

"See ya inside, Alph," Undyne called after her, with the door into Alphys' house and lab already sliding shut.

Alone, Undyne dragged a hand down her face, frowned, and shook her head. She swallowed. Uncomfortable?

No. Jeeze. Stop it.

She wouldn't think about anything - even the weather - right now. She was setting up for a relaxing rest of the day with two of her favorite people in the world, possibly three if Papyrus ended up inviting the kid. Undyne did a stretch and pushed the dark clouds to the back of her mind.

Although elsewhere in Neo New Home, it seemed that there was _someone_ thinking about that sudden change in weather. Frisk declined Papyrus' inevitable invitation, after the latter had zipped over to Alphys' house.

And then they said that they needed to use his phone.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Aw heck, I don't even remember the last time I posted a chapter for this; I've got some really good excuses, but all I can really say is I hope to be more active for this and other fanfictions. Sorry if I'm a bit rusty with it right now, though.

I've been going back to this series a bit recently. I kind of want to edit it from the first story on. But maybe I should wait until I've finished this thing to attempt that. Hmm.

 **Next Chapter:** Higher Prioritized


	5. Higher Prioritized

Now that he knew Alphys' presence was a deterrent to Undyne's, Papyrus thought he wouldn't mind her coming over in person as much. He was, however, getting more and more nervous at the amount of people he was taking into his confidence about this whole affair.

Not only had Sans explained the entire thing to Alphys - who had groaned and wrung her hands, saying that _she_ had business with the other world as well - but that morning Papyrus walked downstairs and found Frisk sitting on the couch while Sans and Alphys talked in front of them, the child munching on an Iscream with their usual stony expression.

He tried to retain his cool, for the sake of the fragile friendship that he and Frisk had developed thus far. But he wanted more than anything to scream at the top of his lungs when Sans' words crossed his not-ears, "...before _her majesty_ sees, don't want her to know that the machine's fixed yet..."

Instead, as he stomped down to the ground floor, he snarled at a slightly lower volume, "WHAT ARE YOU _DOING?_ "

At his voice, Frisk raised their eyes in his direction and smirked. "Eating."

"NOT YOU," he snapped, as Frisk bit off a chunk of the treat. "SANS AND- AND- ALPHYS! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING DISCUSSING THIS MATTER IN FRONT OF-" Frisk was watching, "OF- DISCUSSING IT OPENLY!"

"what, you think the kid's gonna care about a stupid thing like this?" Sans said, jerking a thumb in Frisk's direction. "they don't care. you don't care, do you frisk?"

"I care a little bit."

"see? they don't care."

"BE THAT AS IT MAY," Papyrus began, planting his hands on both hips. "I TOLD YOU TO KEEP THIS QUIET AND I EXPECT YOU TO KEEP IT QUIET. I MADE AN EXCEPTION FOR ALPHYS BECAUSE UNDYNE CLEARLY HATES BEING AROUND HER," as he spoke, he heard Alphys make a whining sound; with a grimace of disgust, he plowed right through it, "BUT FRISK DRAWS UNDYNE LIKE A BRIGHT LIGHT! AND, PRETEND THAT UNDYNE IS A MOTH."

Sinking deeper into the couch, Frisk muttered, "She certainly wrecked my sweater like one." Although it had been newly repaired by the efforts of that Blue Toriel and the spiders in her timeline, Undyne had managed to stretch and tear Frisk's orange and black striped sweater back into the beaten state it was when they all lived underground. She had never been satisfied with the way that her "duel" with the child left off, and was always trying to repeat it for a better outcome than she'd received. But if it were a better outcome she wanted, wouldn't that mean Frisk would die...?

Thinking of that wasn't great for Papyrus' anxiety about the current situation, come to think of it. He couldn't resist scowling at Frisk a little, and Frisk dutifully scowled back. "Why can't you just tell Undyne to fuck off and leave the blue timeline alone?" they said.

"I CAN'T DO THAT," Papyrus said, aghast. "SHE'S MY IMMEDIATE SUPERIOR."

"Well tell Asgore, then. Isn't he _her_ superior?"

"to be honest kid," Sans piped up, cutting Papyrus off as he drew in another breath to shout, "no one really wants to involve his majesty asgore in anything that we don't have to. no offense to him."

"Lots of offense to him."

Papyrus groaned, pacing the floor. "WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO FIX THAT MACHINE UP ANYWAY?"

As he asked, Alphys made a squeak from where she had inched away almost opposite him in the room. Then in a raspy voice, she said, "I-i-it's me, I'm using the m-machine, I need to go to that other world."

"OH YOU _DO,_ DO YOU?"

"Ss-shush!" She snapped, her irritated red eyes flashing. "I was planning to do this way be-before you had this n-non-problem with Undyne!"

At that, Frisk chomped off a lingering chunk of Iscream. "Planning to do what?"

Alphys shot Frisk a dirty look. "N-none of your business." Papyrus could swear that Frisk was mouthing the word "bitch" as they shoved the rest of their snack into their mouth, and Alphys was looking hard at the ground. There was a flush on her scales he didn't understand.

"BUT I DON'T THINK EVEN YOU SHOULD BE GOING OUT THERE? YOU SHOULDN'T BE GOING OUT THERE?" If Alphys up and left, his Undyne-repellent plan was out the window. "YOUR LITTLE PLAN CAN'T POSSIBLY BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN MY PROBLEMS?"

"Friendly reminder, you're not the only p-person with p-p-problems!"

As Papyrus' eyesockets flared, Frisk cut in with the usual sneer, "Oh, wait. Is this about trying to get more relationship advice from the other Alphys?"

"NO! Yes!" Alphys trembled. "M-m-maybe it is! The advice she g-gave me last time isn't working! 'Be yourself,' 'talk to her,' 'show her your DVD collection,' all that, that, that crap! none of it's worked, I,"

As Alphys huffed and puffed that little sneer on Frisk's face turned into something nastier, as it sometimes did. It seemed that the child had the same opinion as Papyrus when it came to Alphys' so-called "problems" that she prioritized so much higher than his own. "Are you stupid? Her advice didn't work that time but you still wanna go ask her for more?"

"Who-who- _who else_ am I supposed to go to for help? _You?_ " Alphys shot Frisk a hateful look, and they responded with a scowl. Papyrus' not-stomach was coiling in knots just watching them.

Luckily, it was Sans who spoke up first an cut in-between them, flicking Frisk on the forehead as he spoke. "this is kind of just alphys' business. look, she'll be in and out before you even know it, she got first dibs, and my other self already promised she could use both machines whenever she wanted. just let her go, boss, we can worry about undyne back here."

Papyrus slammed a fist against his palm, in lieu of a hard surface in his immediate reach. "NO! I WAS NOT TOLD SHE HAD FIRST DIBS, SO THE DIBS DO NOT COUNT!"

"do so."

"DO NOT!"

Sans uttered a frustrated sigh, and with some gall said, "it's not your machine, _bro_." Which immediately rankled Papyrus. But Papyrus was also aware, with Frisk suddenly watching him closely, that he couldn't just go back to how it was underground. He couldn't cow Sans with a threat or a beating, couldn't bully his way to the end of an argument.

Frisk had threatened him once that for every hit, he'd get a hit back. They made good on it.

Papyrus prioritized not being hit with that stupid burnt frying pan. He was probably already going to get more crap from Undyne later. "...FINE, THEN."

"Glad you f-f-f-finally stopped being so-" Alphys sputtered for a moment, and then turned and slunk to the door. "A-anyway, be back soon, um."

By the time the door to the outside slammed and she was gone, Sans had vanished too- with or without the use of doors. It was just Papyrus and Frisk for this brief moment. He folded his arms, biting down on bewildered resentment and frustration he couldn't verbalize.

With a far more neutral face, Frisk wiped their hands on their pants and stood up. "So, what do you think Undyne's gonna do when she's over there? Kill someone?"

Papyrus folded his arms, shifting uncomfortably. "THERE'S THINGS I WORRY ABOUT HAPPENING. WHEN SHE GETS LIKE THAT, 'DUELING' PEOPLE. SHE'S..."

"Didn't you tell me before that she knows restraint and professionalism?"

"I WAS TRYING TO PUT YOU AT EASE!"

"Well we all know what a bang up fucking job you do with that," the child said.

His teeth clacking, Papyrus stomped his foot. "OKAY, LET ME EXPLAIN SOMETHING TO YOU! I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT UNDYNE PUTTING THAT OTHER UNDYNE DOWN A PEG IN A FAIR FIGHT, OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT! IT'S THAT- UNDYNE IS A VERY GOOD FIGHTER. BUT I DON'T THINK SHE'S THE BEST. OBVIOUSLY!" He straightened up, placing a red-gloved hand on his own chest. " _I'M_ THE BEST. BUT ANYWAY, WITH THAT IN MIND, I'M WORRIED ABOUT WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF SHE STARTS TO-" He glanced to the windows, and the door, as if to make absolute sure that Undyne wasn't going to come bursting in at this very inopportune moment. "-LOSE."

"Oh." Frisk shoved their hands in their pockets. "Wow. You think she's not gonna win against herself?"

"WELL THINK ABOUT IT! MY BROTHER IS A CRAVEN COWARD AND A WEAKLING, BUT THAT OTHER VERSION OF HIM WAS ABLE TO FIGHT HIS MAJESTY _KING ASGORE_ TO A STANDSTILL! I DON'T KNOW HOW STRONG THE OTHER UNDYNE IS COMPARED TO OUR UNDYNE."

"How do you know she's strong at all?"

" _I DON'T!_ HONESTLY, TRY TO KEEP UP."

They looked ready to reply to that, probably with another couple of curses peppered in somewhere, before stopping and chewing on a finger. Papyrus' eyebrows raised; maybe for once he actually managed to get through to them about something.

In the end, they said, "Well, I know you don't want her to get over to the blue world at all, but if she does end up finding out the machine works and heads over there, you should call me. We can go after her together."

"...FOR ONCE I'M NOT HAVING SOMEONE TELL ME I'M FUCKING _OVERREACTING_. THANK YOU," Papyrus said. Although, he only hoped that Frisk meant it in a supportive way, and not... that they wanted to come over with him just to see Undyne get beat up.

He wasn't a reader of faces like Sans, so the smile Frisk wore right now was beyond him.

* * *

Things seemed a little weird during the movies at Alphys' place, so after Papyrus left Undyne did too- albeit not for forever, just for half an hour. Just to jog. Undyne always felt better after exercising.

Today, it was the weirdest thing, though. After speeding through New New Home for the next ten minutes, she broke out in a sweat a lot faster than she usually did. And not long after that, she found herself running out of breath way sooner than normal too. It came to a point where she put an end to the jog about a third of the way through her route.

Tired... even though, aside from that training with Alphys, she hadn't done anything to warrant that.

Holy crap that was annoying.

Oh, well. As it had come loose while outside and kept getting in her face, Undyne swept her hair back up in an easier-maintained bun. Then she jogged (at least a little bit more) back to that familiar little lab that she was SO glad wasn't located in Hotland anymore.

When she got inside, the door sliding down shut behind her, Alphys was already talking to someone on the second floor. Undyne quieted a moment, slowing down as she tilted her head; it seemed like a conversation that she was having with herself, if she also happened to, occasionally, have a sore throat.

"...e if you tell me more about her? I-I-I could think of something that w-would work better for her, l-like if not the anime thing, then..."

"M-m-maybe it's just impossible, I should have known better than to, to, to try getting her attention with-"

Having a conversation with herself seemed indeed to be what was going on. There was two of them standing in front of the worktable. One was the Alphys she knew, still in the t-shirt and sweatpants she put on for the movie; the other was an Alphys she'd never actually seen before, dressed in a splotchy labcoat, dark dress, and crooked foggy glasses.

"...ou, you know... you d-don't actually have to go on a date with her first thing, if you barely even talk to her. Um... B-before, I was assuming you-that you guys talked," said the real Alphys.

Quoth the weird Alphys, "W-well, you don't! Have to! Invalidate my-"

Still processing, Undyne had almost summoned a spear- before she thought better of it, as the two simply talked. She could probably lift both of them up, one on each arm, and they could form a freaking reverse pyramid or something.

"Hey, Alphy?" When Undyne called out, the Alphys she was familiar with jumped and the one she wasn't familiar with cringed. Undyne looked up at them both from the lower floor, hand on her hip, and she snorted. "Uh, Alphyses."

"Whatdoyouwant," said the discolored raspy Alphys- Frisk called the weird ones Reds, right? Red Alphys. "You you you you- Undyne,"

Undyne flashed a bright smile their way. "Sorry, am I interrupting something?"

"Um."

Alphys looked to Red Alphys, who fidgeted with her oil-stained labcoat, and then shook her head as she took up the silence with a murmur, "I-it was, um, just a surprise visit, so uh... not reallyabigdealoranythinglikethat..."

"Oh, sure. Hey!" Undyne snapped her fingers, smiling wider, "I think I heard from Frisk that you guys just recently got out from your underground, right? Fucking, congrats dude! How's that feel?"

Red Alphys' cheeks changed color. "It's been, it's been weather. I _mean_ \- fffine. Can can can you stop shouting."

"Sure, just come down here so I don't have to shout at you then."

Although the suggestion hadn't been directed at her specifically, it was the normal Alphys who came down first, as the Red one sucked in her cheeks and seemed to need a second to consider it. Undyne suppressed a frown at it, and only grinned down at Alphys as she rejoined her on the ground floor. "Kind of weird talking to someone who looks just like you, huh?" she said, and proving she actually could talk in a low voice when she did.

"Y-yeah..." Alphys rubbed the back of her head. "L-listen, um, again, uh, sorry..."

"Hey no sweat, it's your house anyway, you can host surprise visits any time you wanna?"

She shook her head, gave a teensy frown. "N-no, I mean for before."

But Undyne's expression stayed the same, albeit with a puzzled twinge. "Huh?" It seemed that only Alphys' probing look brought the memory of any of that training session back up. Undyne snorted. "Man, you don't have anything to apologize about. I already forgot about it. Don't worry."

"I-I-I see," Alphys replied with a quiet push on her glasses. "S-errr, okay... guess I've been uh. I've been uh worrying about it for nothing. Then."

"Sure have."

And then, outside of either of them, there came, "That's enough!"

This time Undyne jumped as well as the regular Alphys; when the hell had Red Alphys gotten downstairs? But anyway, she had stepped closer to them and clawed at her own labcoat for a moment, looking between the couple.

Eventually her gaze settled on Undyne. "You... I I I want to ask you too. How to get her, her her attention, how to... get her to understand. She, she, ignores me. I thought we were... but. But she." She took a deep breath and shook her head, struggling with each sentence.

But in the next moment it seemed to come to her, and she spat with more confidence- a little bit more, "You're already with this-! This Alphys in your world, and that's p-proof enough for me! That we're meant to be together! Me and my Undyne. How did it happen? Was it something she said? Something she did? I asked, I-I even tried confessing, I tried giving her gifts, I I tried, but..."

Red Alphys hung her head a little, her hands clasped. Undyne's smile fell, and for a moment she didn't reply. Alphys, the normal one, was fidgeting off to the side; when their eyes met, Alphys' expression turned into a desperate plea.

Message received; Undyne looked Red Alphys on square in the glasses and said, "Well, I don't know what to tell you. If she's not interested, she's not interested."

Alphys placed a hand over her mouth, and Red Alphys didn't move a muscle. Undyne shrugged. Should she say it louder? She materialized a spear in her hand and slung it over her shoulders. For the aesthetic. "I mean, if she's just waiting for you to make a move or something? That's different. But if she's not wanting to be in a relationship, if she's not liking the gifts and the confession, you just gotta accept that and move on."

"M-m-m-move on?"

It was impossible to discern Red Alphys' true mood with those foggy glasses that obscured her eyes. Undyne tried again, "There's plenty of other fish in the Kingdom of Monsters, you know? I get that it's hard, but, just because me and Alphy are together doesn't? mean? that you guys have to be? You're not exactly clones of us, y'know?"

Silence.

Alphys was by her side, slipping one scaly hand around Undyne's arm. "Besides, m-maybe what she really wants is space. A-and when you give her some, sh-she'll come around?"

Silence.

"Dude, did you hear us?" Undyne waved a hand in front of Red Alphys' face. "It's not on you anymore, it's on her."

"I-" Red Alphys' head jerked back up, and then seemed to have frozen again. "I thought you'd know. But... maybe you're right..." Her glasses slid just a little on her face; the eyes that peered at them from behind the lenses were bloodshot and strange. "Maybe our worlds were too different."

She took a step back; her muttering seemed to be more to herself, although she kept glancing their way as if for approval. "So so so maybe, instead of doing whatever y-you did, I ought to... mmm," she wrung her hands. O...kay?

But it seemed to work out, because a second later Red Alphys said, to them, "Th-thank you. For what you said."

"Hey, no problem-"

"Oh, uh, by the way," she cut in. "M-m-maybe instead of leaving I should stick around. B-b-b-because I think you-you'll get to see her again soon. She she's coming here."

Alphys' grip on Undyne's arm tightened. "Uh, why?"

"Oh, you know." Red Alphys smiled. And as she smiled, her sharp teeth glinting a pale yellow, she motioned towards Undyne. "To fight you. She's crazy about it. She she's not interested in _me_ at all but she's _really_ eager to take _you_ on.

"Sounds fun, right?"

* * *

 **Author's Note:** I wish that these characters had meta-knowledge so that they would internally refer to Underfell Alphys as Fellphys.

I wanna just finish this fic too

 **Next Chapter:** Have a Good Time


	6. Have A Good Time

"HELL yeah!"

Alphys squeaked, giving a small jump. Just as the other Alphys was settling on a chair downstairs and pulling out her smartphone (was she just going to hang out here the whole time?) Undyne pumped her fists in the air, a big toothy smile on her face, and something didn't seem right here. Alphys quickly let go of Undyne's arm, rubbing her palm on her coat, and then put her hands on her hips. "Uh, hell yeah?"

Undyne's good eye flickered back her way, that grin not lessening. "Oh I mean, this could be fun! I've never sparred with myself before, never got a chance to straight-up duel me either."

"I mean... right... but..." Alphys tapped her claws together, and to give her hands something to do she retrieved her phone from her pocket and thought about texting somebody.

Frisk was never very good about answering texts, though. They only liked to use their phone for talking... but talking on the phone was so awful? She hated it? What was wrong with text messages? "Um..." what was she going to say? She didn't know even when she started on this sentence. "..." Oh, that was it. That was the end of the sentence. She was done apparently.

Alphys chewed on the inside of her mouth.

"I wonder if I can get her contact info before the fight," Undyne was saying, after patiently waiting for that sentence that just trailed off to finish trailing. She mimicked Alphys' example and pulled out her phone, smiling big. "Pick a place, date, time..."

"Oh! But!" NO she had it now. "What if it's n-not... like sparring? Like, what if she wants to take you on just to h-hurt you?"

Undyne's eyebrows raised. "Hurt me? Why? I've barely said like two words to her." At that, Alphys stuck her tongue in her cheek and made a shrugging gesture, as if she shouldn't guess even though she actually had an idea.

Seeing that, Undyne snorted and laughed. "I mean, I know that the monsters in that other world can be pretty aggressive. I still gotta find a way to get back at that 'Red Sans' for the MESS he and his Frisk made in New Home." She cracked her fist against her palm. "I guess if she really wants to go all out, that's what's gonna happen. I'm not gonna just run away like a coward or something."

The damage that had been done to New Home while the "Red" monsters were here wasn't extensive, but all the cracked buildings had been a pain to fix. But it could have been worse. Alphys considered that, if Undyne had known at the time that Red Sans had forcefully traded places with their own Sans to stay here, she would have reduced him to mere dust on the ground.

"Iiiiii just, don't like the sound of it is all. Thosemonstersarekindofcreepyit'slikethere'ssomethingwrongwiththem-" The last words came out in a tiny rush, Alphys lowering her voice in case the Red Alphys heard her.

Scooping up and throwing away a wrapper that had missed the trash can (Alphys had been intending to get to it sometime) Undyne didn't answer her. "Speaking of that..." Rather, she called out to the Red Alphys directly, "Hey! Dizzyface! You gonna stick around all day or what?"

Red Alphys jumped, and she glared ruefully up at them both. "N-no! I just!" She looked back at her phone, her expression softening. "Th th this wifi, it's. Th thi this is... you can get onto human websites from here."

"It's an update from the undernet," said Alphys, pushing up on her glasses with as much authority as she could muster. "S-since we live in such proximity to-to humans we um, have the same wifi now."

"We we we we don't have any internet," Red Alphys said, scrolling wistfully through her phone. Her glasses slipped down on her face, revealing bloodshot and baggy eyes. "We uh we, we left it behind underground when-when Frisk..."

Undyne put her hands on her hips. "Woah, really, no wifi _or_ wifu?"

"Nowaifueither," Alphys said under her breath, and Undyne started laughing.

In the next moment she added, "No I mean, I'm sorry, that sucks! You should ask the humans to loan you theirs."

She gave a glance towards regular Alphys, as if trying to see if their previous conversation was over. Alphys didn't respond to her look; Undyne was the one that called out to Red Alphys, after all... So. So. Apparently that meant their conversation _was_ over. Undyne vaulted over the second floor railing and onto the first floor, landing with a sharp crack! that made both Alphyses jump.

The floor looked okay at least.

But Red Alphys just snorted dismissively. "Can't."

"Well if they won't give it to you for free, just beat the hell out of some of them. That's your guys's thing, right?"

"N-no-I mean-th-that-ugh!" Red Alphys rubbed her face. "Th-th-the humans don't even know that we we exist but _go off_ I guess."

"Huh? But you're on the surface now," said the regular Alphys. She took the down escalator.

"It it it doesn't matter." This supremely tired looking monster expelled a breath. "We we haven't t-tried to approach them yet. Th th the king wants us to wait. Sssssince we d-don't have an ambassador to t-talk to them for us."

Red Sans and Red Papyrus, and Red Frisk especially, had popped over to visit a couple of times since their worlds had become aware of each other. On none of those occasions had they mentioned how things went when the monsters were let up onto the surface. It had seemed rude to ask, at least to Alphys. And even more important, she didn't really want to ask a question she was afraid to hear the answer to.

But now she was wishing that she had, like the many other things she wished she'd done long after it was time to do them. "Um..." God her throat was so dry suddenly. "Frisk didn't want to do it?"

Red Alphys shook her head. Undyne's lip curled and her confused frown turned into a scowl; Alphys could guess what she was thinking, but she didn't say anything.

" _Literalscum_ ," Red Alphys hissed to herself.

And that didn't seem right, but Alphys didn't know enough about Red Frisk to want to dispute it. Or did she? She knew what she'd seen Papyrus say about them on the internet, and she knew what the people in the Red World were like, especially with that version of _her_ right there, so she could make an education assumption about why Red Frisk might not have... but they might get mad at her, or tell her more information she somehow missed.

So an awkward silence just hung heavy between the three of them in the lab, until finally Undyne pulled out her phone. "Hey, do you have your Undyne's number by chance?"

" _No_ I _don't_." The Red Alphys was already returning her gaze to her phone, a sickly curved smile growing her face as she flipped through internet tabs and scrolled across social media sites. "Nnnnot anymore."

"Aw man. Oh well, guess I'm gonna do a couple extra laps just in case. I was feeling kinda funny before."

So saying, Undyne gave a wave to Alphys (that she took too long to wave back to gaaahh,) and then went on her way out from the lab, stopping once to clear her throat hard.

She was so hot. Stepping into the sun like that, her fishy skin sparkling.

Alphys gave a little sigh, and of course Red Alphys was staring at her.

 _Oh my god,_ Alphys suddenly realized, _she left me all alone with her. She left me all alone with this weird kind-of-clone of me and I have no idea what to say oh my god._

She'd offer her a snack, but she was loathe to leave more wrappers lying around. Alphys cleared her throat, and Red Alphys looked back up. "L-listen, um, do you have any idea when your Undyne will be... getting here?"

For the first time the other one's sour expression changed. Whether it was positive or negative was hard to tell with those thick dirty glasses, though. "As soon as she knows she can. Which, which which which she doesn't. Me and Sans told her that the machine was on the fritz, _again_ , but I could let her know that that that it works now." She rubbed her face. "Maybe she'd l-l-like that? Maybe I could tell her that, that I fixed it? Specifically? For her?"

"You, um, seem to do a lot of lying to her."

At that, Red Alphys looked away and made a soft gulp, turning her eyes back to her smartphone as if Alphys were looking with the most judgmental expression ever. Well... "I'm, uh," she tried again. "I'm not trying to uh, judge you or anything. And this is based more on, other stuff that you said, before, uh... When me and Undyne... er, _before_ we were dating, I did that a lot too. E-even more than I, do now, haha, causeit'sactuallyahardhabittobreak." Although it wasn't anything serious anymore, like... what she did to all those old Fallen Down monsters, or how much of a loser she really was and all the lies she'd told to make herself sound cooler.

Now it was just little things. Like, yeah she did her training today, or yeah she did the laundry, or yeah she was eating something other than cup ramen for dinner. Little things over the phone or over texts. So she wouldn't get worried, or so she wouldn't get frustrated and think that Alphys was putting all that hard work she did with Papyrus to waste. Even if sometimes she kinda was.

What was her point again?

"Just... it's gotta s-stop. Or, s-sort of stop, so at least you're not telling her big ones? D-did you ever... did she find out about the... thing with the... amalga-"

"Of course she knows about that! Frisk _blabbed_ it all over town!" Red Alphys cut in with a huge gasp of breath.

Blink. With her invisible eyelid so it wasn't actually noticeable, but still. "Okay, w-well, then. Do you have any other _b-big_ secrets that you're keeping from heruh you also don't have to uhh t-tell me what they are if you don't want to."

The answer was apparently yes. "I... Keeping secrets isn't the problem!" snapped Red Alphys.

But even as she glared, this was one area that Alphys was over 65% confident in and so, hands clasped, she replied, "B-but telling lies is _a_ problem. And y-you two already seem so distant... m-making even more distance seems... like a bad idea?"

"I'm not the one making distance!"

Alphys stuck her tongue in the side of her mouth and shrugged. There were more things she could say, but... but what? "But, well, if she already isn't interested, she might not take it really well if she finds out the things you lied about, t-too..."

Much to her relief, Red Alphys didn't protest anymore after that. In fact, she hopped right up off the chair and closed her phone. When she spoke, though, her voice was already drifting. "Whatever. Everything went really differently for you. Even, even, even even your Frisk, even the humans here are-are different I bet. I, I should get back. Thanks for _wasting_ my time. I'll go... just go conduct more research back home."

As her sore-throated counterpart waddled to the door, head ducked down at level with her body like a rat, Alphys tentatively called out, "Uh. Well have a good time, then."

(Maybe that research would involve something actually good and not those pulpy brainless superhero movies that Red Frisk started telling them all about once.)

Alphys waited until she was the only one left in the lab.

And then, with a big inhale, she started texting Frisk.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Mmmmm convos.

Sorry guys ;-; been having a hard time with this fic.

I lost my old inspiration on it so I'm tryin to find a new one.

 **Next Chapter:** Picking Cherries


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